Analog Paneer : Some  Food for thought.

I can’t seem to scroll through my feed without seeing someone interviewing the latest hero of a nation that seems to desperately needs heroes to keep it’s hopes alive.

Tukaram Mundhe, the name that is now all over the feeds.

Whether Mundhe is able to carry on with his crusade without being clipped by the powerful lobbies remains to be seen, but then he is doing well at least as of now.

Every news channel is out to have an interview with him. Some anchors ask him routine questions with a smile on their face enjoying the fact they got the chance to interview him . Some sit down with the expression of someone who swallowed a beetle with the paneer dish they ate at a fancy restaurant the earlier evening,

The stories keep coming, of life threats, transfers,and tap-on-the shoulder from the courts. The story of that rare breed of upright and honest men.

He takes all questions with an ease that comes from being clear about what he does. There is an air of honesty about him and that is what  makes him a hero.

Now let us cut the noise out , stand back and have a look again.

What exactly is he doing. He is asking his teams to ensure that the laws that are laid out are followed. These are not Income tax rules or some rule framed for financial transactions, these are laws that insist that the food being sold is safe.

It feels familiar and begs the question on what was happening all these years.

The very guy that makes the reel on Mundhe, will in a few weeks get himself to some street food vendor and make a reel on how the fancy bread pakora on the dusty and dirty streets of Delhi are the next thing to god.

When a nation makes a hero out of an official who is honest, it exposes the mess we are in.

In a decent world , one would imagine that a man who is dishonest is exposed and made a villain, but we are in such a state of moral decline that a Mundhe or a Khemka is our hero. Heroes they are but where are the villains.

All said and done, I am  sure the nation will move on to another reel worthy character in a few weeks. It is eyeballs that matter and not the sustenance of an idea.

We as a population will move on , fall for that urge to have the next plate of noodles made in crude oil and wait for the next rare reel that celebrates honesty.

I have to confess that all this has taught me a few things I didn’t know.

For one Analog Paneer.

What the heck was that I thought?

It seems such a thing exists and is actually sold as a product. Really?

Analog? Well, then what is the original paneer, Digital??.

Why can’t we call it artificial paneer, meaning one that is not original. Like in artificial flowers, artificial limbs, and yes, artificial intelligence.

Calling it analog gives it a cloak of respectability and makes it sound like an actual product.

Now that people have found a trend, which is what matters these days, we are learning more. Milk may contain shampoo or detergent. Oil might contain less oil and more some chemical that makes oil look oil without being actually oil.

Butter might be mayonnese with a yellow oil paint and probably good to use on a water colour painting of sunflower fields.

Here we are, one of the world’s largest economies, still wondering whether the paneer on the plate is actually paneer.

One officer can make a trend, but when there are elements who have killed their conscience and get around doing this, there is what they call a losing battle.

Imagine the psyche of a person who wakes up early, get some brick powder, mixes into the chilli powder and then packages it in a fake package of an established brand.

He then sneaks it into the retail chain, collects his money, has a drink on the way home and goes to sleep. He does not realise that he very drink he has had is probably laced with tincure by another guy who is as morally degraded as he is.

As they say, what you win at the stakes you lose at the roundabouts.

All I can say is…

Best of luck to me, you and Mundhe.

So here we are where a tin of rasgola is looked at suspicion, chilli powder can probably used as brick if moulded well, and milk could be used in the shower.

Enough of complaining, why don’t I do something, well here is my response.

I have a business idea now, inspired by one of my favorites songs. A business idea that solves the problem.

I had always liked Sahir Ludhianvi’s lyrics in the song from 1968 film Neel Kamal. They are like a prophecy or speak of a malady that always existed in plain sight,

Sung brilliantly by Manna Dey with effervescent Mahmood on the screen, this is my start up idea in this era of startups.

Mahmood is selling empty bottles and tins and the song goes….

Khali Dabba Khali Bottal le le meri jaan.

Khalli se nafart mat karna Khali sab Sansar

( Come dear,  buy empty bottles and cans , don’t hate empty, the whole world is empty)

and then comes the stunner that makes my start up idea…

Khali ki guarantee dunga Bhare huye ke kya guarantee?

( I can guarantee the empty can and not the filled one)

He goes on to describe what we see today while we celebrate a tiny crusade from an honest guy.

Hear the song here and pull out your purses for I will shortly be listing my company on the stock exchanges.